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Writer's pictureDiane Jolicoeur

Dealing with Loss of Confidence

Updated: Jul 17, 2018


Confidence is not constant. There are times in life when we have an abundance. And there are times when a life event will pull the rug out from under our feet and it feels like confidence is crashing along with it in a million pieces. Be it job loss, relationship conflicts, relationship loss, unexpected financial challenges – the list goes on. These situations can cause us to question ourselves at the core of who we are.


There are also moments in the day where our level of confidence shifts. For example: when we receive feedback that’s a little hard to take and it causes us to question our capabilities; or a comment is made that challenges our sense of feeling appreciated.


People deal with loss of confidence differently:

· Some people ignore the situation and pretend it didn’t happen and nothing is wrong.

· Some people become angry, defensive, and argumentative.

· Some people freeze - finding it difficult to make decisions for fear of making a wrong move or because they’ve lost belief in their sense of value and abilities.

· And some may experience all three in different stages.


Be they major events or momentary doubts, the question is: How do you recover and re-claim your confidence? From my own experience, here are a few thoughts that I hope will inspire opportunities to create a positive shift.


· Avoid the stories. It’s important to become clear on what the facts are versus the beliefs you may be creating about yourself through it. This rabbit hole can be a confidence vacuum.


· Rather than seeing a situation as a confidence killer, take the perspective of seeing it as your confidence builder. Ask yourself: how can I grow from this?


· Have courage. It’s in doing and moving forward that builds confidence along the way. It’s the time to dig deep and say yes to yourself even though you doubt.


· Remember who you are – your intentions of goodness; your successes and accomplishments; your strengths and qualities. And… your value as a human being with a unique purpose.


· Loss of confidence can also lead to or be a result of depression. In this case, it’s important to seek appropriate help in order to address the root causes and move towards healing.


Confidence is a journey of consciousness and choice. And no matter what the circumstance, it is a worthy path.


Written by: Diane Jolicoeur

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